School update.....

My ex and I had that long talk Weds. morning. I felt a  bit better after it even though he was saying we should fight to keep her at GW.

So then I get a call yesterday (Thursday) at work from T. She sounded awful. She said her Dad turned up at her school late Weds. night. He brought food and they talked. She said, "Ima, he tried for AN HOUR to convince me to stay here. I kept telling him 'no, Abba, no, I don't want, no, no". He doesn't listen. What's his PROBLEM? He's so annoying!" She's totally had it with him but is too polite to let fly and give him a piece of her mind. She said he said, "You have friends here and there's a swimming pool....." She told him, "And a swimming pool is going to help me study next year????" THAT'S MY GIRL! After she told me how their conversation went my heart was in my toes. I told her to keep pestering him - sms's, phone calls - every day and I promised her that I would try again to speak to him late that night which I did.

Before I made the call I was thinking, "OK. What can I say that I haven't already said?" Then I had a wicked idea.

I phoned him up. We were both like "What's up? What's new?" I said, "I just thought you should know that you left your daughter in a very fragile emotional state Wednesday night." He was startled, "What do you mean?" I said, "She is angry, frustrated and very disappointed in you and you left her feeling that you were belittling her choice, her desires and that she hadn't been heard."

Him: "All I did was talk to her. What. I'm not allowed to speak to my own daughter? Yes, I tried to convince her to stay but that's not a crime."

Me: "No. That's all fine. But she felt you didn't hear her side. She feels that you are going to try to force her to stay at GW."

Him: "I would never  force her to stay in a place where she's suffering. If you ask me, she's depressed because of the Ritalin. I want her to stop taking it NOW. And she's depressed because you forced her to go for these two weeks of summer camp when she doesn't want to be there. If she thinks she'll do better and be happy at WIZO then let her go to WIZO. I can't force her to stay anywhere. I think you should go NOW (10:30 pm) and take her home. You want me to go get her? I'll go right this minute.

Me: "Um. Let me talk to her first and see if she wants to come home or finish the summer camp."

Him: "We don't need their stupid summer camp. It's a waste of her time, they're not really learning anything, the food is terrible and she's bored."

Me: "If T feels the Ritalin is not helping or is harming her she will stop it. And if one of us does go get her tonight or tomorrow morning and brings T home early from the summer camp you DO realize that there's no going back and asking them to keep her next year. And if you are serious about what you're saying then I'm going to expect to receive your agreement that she goes to WIZO in writing. This child has been through enough and I DO NOT want you to change your mind and cause legal problems for her in the middle of the year."

Him: "You have always chosen her schools and I never said anything. I wouldn't do that to her. Just don't come to me next year crying that it's not a good school or that she's going down the wrong path!"

Me: "Don't worry. Wouldn't dream of it."

I have never seen such a quick turnaround! MEN!

After I hung up with him, I called T and told her the gist. She was HORRIFIED that I'd put it in such terms as "fragile emotional state". She said, "OMG, he probably thinks I'm dying." Me: "Well, when you talk to him in the morning you can reassure him that you're not." I told her drastic means require drastic measures. And it looks like it worked! I need him to sign something fast before he changes his mind.

That is my project for this week.

What a rollercoaster ride!